Go Platinum With Miranda Lambert, Belly Up to The Bard, Help the Rangers Break In Their New Entertainment Complex, Throw Down With Some MMA, Convene With Some Harry Potter Nerds or Chow Down at a Barbecue Fest.

Have you ever masturdated?

Wait, it’s not what you think. It’s actually not an embarrassing subject to discuss at all.

Like that other, similar sounding solo activity, the term masturdating refers to taking yourself out on a “date.” Or call it whatever you want. Just don’t be afraid to fly solo at some point this week. There’s too much cool stuff going on to miss out waiting for other folks to show.

Monday (8.6)
Shakespeare in the Bar: Measure for Measure at Deep Ellum Art Co.
To drink or not to drink.

Top Gun at Angelika Film Center
Don’t lose that loving feeling.

Tuesday (8.7)
Tory Lanez at House of Blues
Memories don’t die.

Slices for Supplies at GAPCo
It’s fo the kids.

Tuesday Night Trash at Texas Theatre
Expect No Mercy.

Wednesday (8.8)
Jay Mewes and His A-Mewes-Ing Stories at Addison Improv
Snoochie boochies.

Jason Boland at The Yard
Don’t be a straggler.

South San Gabriel at Kessler Theater
You’re too young to die.

Takashi Murakami Pop-Up Art Dinner at Dallas Fish Market
A five-course dinner from Chef Richard Triptow.

Thursday (8.9)
Grand Opening at Texas Live
The Toadies break in the Rangers’ new entertainment digs.

Ha Ha Tonka at Three Links
Race to the bottom.

Texas Cocktails: Book Signing Party at Industry Alley
Read up.

Frida 35mm + Viva La Vida Foodie Pop-Up at Texas Theatre
Prepare to be seduced.

Friday (8.10)
Bleachers at Texas Live
Lena Dunham’s bf keeps the grand opening celebrations rolling.

DJ Snoopadelic at Lava Cantina
It’s Snoop Dogg.

The NeverEnding Story at Inwood Theatre
What’s my name?

Marvel Universe Live at American Airlines Center
Is your spider sense tingling?

G-Eazy at Dos Equis Pavilion
Sorry not sorry.

Leaky Con at Dallas Convention Center (Sold Out)
The world’s largest Harry Potter convention.

Daniel Markham Does Neil Young at Andy’s Bar
Keep searching for a heart of gold.

Legacy Fighting Alliance 47 at The Bomb Factory
Let’s get it on.

Saturday (8.11)
Kip Moore at Texas Live
More grand opening fun.

Photo Swap Meet at Dallas Center for Photography
Say cheese.

6-Pack Trail, Bike Cruise & Craft Beer Tour at L.U.C.K. (Sold Out)
Get on your bikes and drink.

Waylon on Ya at Double Wide
A night of Waylon Jennings and whiskey.

King Camelversary at Three Links
With A Giant Dog, Sub-Sahara, Rosegarden Funeral Party, Lizzie Boredom.

Miranda Lambert, Little Big Town at Dos Equis Pavilion
This ain’t your mama’s broken heart.

Low & Slow North Texas BBQ & Music Festival at The Longhorn Ballroom
Saucy.

Gorgon City at Stereo Live Dallas
Go deep.

Flatland Cavalry at Granada Theater
Summertime loves.

Sunday (8.12)
Meat Fight 1K at TUPPS Brewery
Get the runs.

Water Balloon Wars! at Deep Ellum
Waste some water.

Aqua: Cray at SiSu Uptown Resort
Take a dive.

Cookie and Beer Pairing at L.U.C.K.
It’s all about the cookie. And beer.

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