We Taste-Tested And Analyzed Eight Different North Texas Waters To Find The Best One Out There, Because Not All H20 Is Built The Same.

Besides baring the basis of life, all water bears a unique taste.

For the nonbelievers (and chronically dehydrated) who claim water has no taste: Think again. Lately, with the ongoing pandemic and the ever-growing search to live as long as possible, health has become a huge priority. One way to ensure healthy living is to eat plenty of vegetables and drink lots of water. This isn’t a groundbreaking discovery, it’s science — much like the flavor profile of water.

Depending on a water’s source, filtration, pH balance and mineral and gas content, water’s flavor profiles can vary anywhere from acidic to bitter, sweet to salty and from smooth to complex. For example, many believe that “pure water” should objectively taste great given the name, but because of the high mineral content, most people think it actually tastes bland or flat. But maybe flat is what sates your tastebuds, which is OK! After all, water preferences are usually based on what you believe is the perfect balance of sodium, calcium, magnesium, potassium, chloride, bicarbonate and sulfate along with carbon dioxide, nitrogen and oxygen gases.

While most people probably aren’t thinking about all that when they’re taking a sip, water sommelier Martin Riese likely is. Yes, water sommeliers exist and they’re serious about their shit. It makes sense — different flavor profiles of water, much like wine, can affect or enhance your dining experience entirely. Riese shares this and more on comedian Tom Segura’s Your Mom’s House podcast, in which he educates Segura on various waters from around the world.

As hilarious as the bit is, this inspired us to do some more research. For this, we took multiple trips to various bourgeoisie grocery stores, picked up a few North Texas-ish bottled waters and hydrated both our body and mind in order to find the reigning champion of North Texas hydration.

8. Crazy Water No. 4

Type: Mineral water.
Source: Mineral Wells, TX.
Size: 1 Liter
Sweet/salty: Salty.
Smooth/complex:
Complex.
pH: 7.8 – 8.5

Final thoughts: This is not beginner water — this is for those who enjoy drinking water that tastes like it’s been sitting in a Nerf gun all day. If you ever drank out of a water hose, this might be the water for you. The flavor profile is more of a salty and complex side, which makes sense considering this is the fullest bodied water with the strongest amount of mineral content available. It’s like licking the bottom of a battery, but again, maybe you’re into that.

7. Ozarka Natural Spring Water

Type: Spring water.
Source: Wood County, Texas, Walker County, Texas and Henderson County, Texas.
Size: 16.9 oz.
Sweet/salty: Sweet.
Smooth/complex:
Smooth.
pH balance:
5.4 to 7.1

Final thoughts: If you grew up in North Texas, you likely already have a haphazardly opened crate of these atop your refrigerator. It’s the essential water for hydrating yourself during a soccer match, sneaking vodka into public spaces or hydrating yourself from a hangover that results from the latter. This is a go-to and dependable water for a crisp refreshing sip with a sharp aftertaste.

6. Crazy Water No. 3

Type: Mineral water.
Source: Mineral Wells.
Size: 1 Liter
Sweet/salty: Salty.
Smooth/complex:
Complex.
pH balance: 7.3 to 8

Final thoughts: In the Crazy Water line, this is the mid-range between the water that tastes like batteries and its nicer, more sippable sibling you’ll find out more about as we journey through this list. This water contains a medium mineral content and is perfect if you want water with clear mineral content, yet don’t want to make water drinking feel like some arduous task. It’s good.

5. Richard’s Sparkling Rainwater

Type: Sparkling rainwater.
Source: Dripping Springs.
Size: 12 oz.
Sweet or salty: Salty.
Smooth or complex:
Smooth.
pH balance: 5.6 to 5.8

Final thoughts: bUt YoU SaiD NoRtH TeXaS WaTeR!!! Yes, but the very shy and nice long-haired boy working at Whole Foods claimed this was local and we took some home and actually liked it. This company captures rainwater before it ever hits the ground, making it extremely sustainable. Plus, rainwater is local everywhere, technically. Because there are no minerals or additives, the carbonation in this doesn’t linger as long as the bubbles do in a Topo Chico or a La Croix, thus making it easy to distinguish the salty and smooth flavor profile. This is a friendly sipper for those looking to get into bubbly waters but don’t want to get too intense.

4. Crazy Water No. 2

Type: Mineral water
Source: Mineral Wells.
Size: 1 Liter.
Sweet or salty: A tinge of saltiness.
Smooth or complex:
Just a little complex, but otherwise very smooth.
pH balance: 7.5 to 8.9

Final thoughts: This mineral water goes hard. If mineral water is your thing and you want something crispy and refreshing with a little bit of that alkaline taste, this is your go-to. In fact, you could probably give this water to the pickiest water drinker that refuses to even taste mineral water and they’d likely dig it. This is the ideal taste that comes to mind when you think of water with a decent magnesium and calcium content.

3. Mercy Wells

Type: Spring water.
Source: Keller.
Size: 1 Gal.
Sweet or salty: Salty.
Smooth or complex:
Smooth.
pH balance: 5.4 to 7.1

Final thoughts: This is solid drinking water with just a hint of saltiness at the end, making for a smooth finish. The best part is, a portion of the proceeds from each purchase of a Mercy Wells product goes toward supplying drinkable water to remote Liberian villages, according to the brand. Much like a Forever 21 shopping bag, Mercy Wells proudly displays Proverbs 19:17 on their label for some holy, feel-good razzle-dazzle. We appreciate Mercy Well’s seemingly wholesome philosophy.

2. Rain Fresh H20

Type: Purified water.
Source: Garland.
Size: 1 Liter.
Sweet or salty: Slightly sweet.
Smooth or complex:
Smooth.
pH balance: 7.5

Final thoughts: This has to be the most transparent water company we’ve encountered so far, no pun intended. The Rain Fresh H20 website is extremely informative in providing details about its purification system you didn’t even realize you wanted to know. Aside from the impressive transparency, the water itself is oxygen-rich thanks to the brand’s advanced water purification process. The oxygen-rich water tastes like you’re drinking pure liquid air, which makes this water great for people, pets, plants and just about all things living. It may as well be a homeopathic medicine if you were to somehow label water as anything healthier than it already is. Surprisingly great stuff, Garland!

1. Absopure

Type: Purified water.
Source: Dallas.
Size: 1 Gal.
Sweet or salty: Salty.
Smooth or complex:
Smooth.
pH balance: 7.5

Final thoughts: This is the kind of water you take with you to the gym, the mall and literally everywhere else. Yes, the entire gallon. First of all, the packaging design with the ergonomic handle is worthy of its own praise. In addition, the label that looks like it was designed by a teenager in Sweden is also pretty great. The taste itself is incredibly smooth and immediately refreshing — it doesn’t have that cheap plastic taste that a lot of purified waters have. This is truly something to keep in your refrigerator at all times. What’s more, your Brita filter will not even deliver a clean taste like this, but It may also be because you still have the same filter on from last summer. Go change that, or simply pick up one of these babies.

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