Try to Stay Alive As Beer and Wine Fight to the Death for Cheese's Affection.

I'm officially declaring Thursday as a shoo-in for my “Top 7 Days of the Week” list that I will eventually make, publish and generate large amounts of profit from. Why, you ask? Because it seems like we just can't wait until Friday to go out anymore. Thursday is like a fun pre-Friday that you try to keep a secret because you don't want Friday to get hella jealous. Plus, Monday is already suicidal so you know you don't want to push those buttons.

The Store at the DMA
The Store is a 1983 documentary about the customers and employees of the Dallas' Neiman Marcus. Set during the holiday season, it's bound to be filled with information on department store history. While it may seem like a niche interest, the Dallas-centric history might be very enlightening.

Beer vs. Wine Smackdown at Scardello
Scardello is hosting a “Beer vs/ Wine Smackdown,” where beer and wine will fight to the death about which beverage goes better with cheese. Since the Thunderdome was apparently already booked, an arena will be built inside Scardello, where the two opposing beverages will be forced to play ring toss until a slice of Buffalo Mozzarella cheese declares the winner from his throne.

F. is for Frank Looking Party
Looking at stuff is one of my favorite activities. You only really need your eyeballs (and binoculars, if you're a pro like me) and free time. So why not attend a party where you look at stuff? In this scenario, “stuff” is the debut of F. is for Frank's fall collection, which will include jewelry and housewares.

Give 'Em Heel: Moulin Rouge Fashion Show at the Rose Room in S4
While I'm contractually obligated to make fun of anything with “Moulin Rouge” in the title, this event is in benefit of LGBT teens so I'll back off. I'm assuming the fashion is “cabaret style,” though, or else my worst fears have come true and “Moulin Rouge” is a phrase that no longer has any meaning.

The Paperhead, Fungi Girls and Joey Gorman & The Longshots at the Where House
Join Nashville's The Paperhead, along with locals Fungi Girls and Joey Gorman & The Longshots, for a psychedelic and garage rock-heavy evening. According to the Facebook event, Fungi Girls should be debuting some new songs.

Extreme Midget Wrestling at McKinney Avenue Tavern
If regular wrestling is too classy for you, why not take it up a notch with one of the last publicly acceptable forms of exploitation?

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