Crank That.

By now, you know of the sensation that is Sharknado, right? Well, you probably also know that there too exists a sequel, that it premiered just a few days ago and that it stars the drab and untalented Tara Reid of American Pie fame.

Well, did you know that Reid has released a Sharknado-themed perfume that will give Stetson and all of the grocery store-exclusive fragrances a run for their money? Because she has and it's called “Shark by Tara.”

Oy.

Let's hope the Internet has a lot more interesting things to show us next week. In the meantime, here's what you can do this weekend to pass the time. For instance, you can come hang out with us at Ben Kweller at Granada Theater
Greenville native Ben Kweller has been all over the map — sound-wise, at least — throughout his career. Since breaking out as a teen, he's effortlessly bounced from piano pop and folky acoustic numbers to country music and the more electrified rock stuff heard on his latest release, Go Fly a Kite. For his current tour, Kweller's band is performing as an all-electric power trio. More important: The current Austin resident always seems to bring his A-game for his “homecoming” gigs in Dallas. — Cory Graves

Toad the Wet Sprocket at House of Blues
Here's a fun fact about these venerable alt-rockers: Their band name comes from a Monty Python sketch about a band with a name that, in the words of cast member Eric Idle, was “so silly that no one would ever use it or dream it could ever be used.” So there's that. Anyway, though Toad the Wet Sprocket's name may be silly, the band has been going strong over two decades now, so maybe you shouldn't laugh this listing off so quickly. — Stephen Young

STIFF at Plano Children's Theatre
The Fun House Theatre has a new play out this weekend called STIFF. This murder mystery is set in the '20s during the Broadway boom. So, no, it's not a cool Divergent reference. — CW

“UNBURDEN” at Ro2 Art
After a successful first show, artist Erica Felicella is throwing her second installation of her “UNBURDEN” series. Here, she's locking herself in a mock prison cell, while asking that you come visit her and tell her your secrets. She swears she'll keep them, honest. — CW

Us the Duo at Trees
Music act Us the Duo met, fell in love and made a hit album just three years ago. Following that was hit YouTube videos that further put the band's name on the map all over the Internet. Here, the duo will perform songs from its first two albums — while promoting a third that's slated to release in the spring. Caroline Glaser opens. — CW

The Blues Brothers at Angelika Film Center
In this 1980 cult classic, Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi's SNL characters successfully made the jump to the big screen. Aside from being one of the legitimately funniest movies of all time, the film also features notable musical performances from such legends as James Brown, Cab Calloway, Aretha Franklin, Ray Charles and John Lee Hooker. — CG


F U T U R E at That That
Chris Lund and Kelsey Kincannon have got something pretty cool up their sleeves these days. For the past few months, Dallas natives Lund, also known by his Left/Right DJ moniker, and Kelsey Kincannon, who DJs as Tresspass, have been throwing one of the most detail-oriented and promising recurring gigs in town. “A lot of people in Dallas boast about cutting-edge events, but these guys are the ones actually doing it,” says DJ Colly T, who'll be performing at this event. The FUTURE is bright, indeed. — Heather Abbott

Kentucky Knife Fight at Double Wide
Over the past few years, we've seen St. Louis hard-edged blues rockers Kentucky Knife Fight so many times (read: at least a couple dozen) that we sometimes forget they're not locals. In fact, it's not until they express a little too much enthusiasm for regional delicacies like Lone Star and Whataburger that we're reminded that they really aren't from around here. As anyone who's seen Kentucky Knife Fight perform live can attest to, that's a sentiment that comes pretty naturally: Not only do the boys roll through town fairly often during their relentless trips across the country, but their dueling guitar licks, frenetically hip bass lines and fist-pumping choruses just have a way of drawing the listener in. J. Charles & the Trainrobbers and Foxtrot Uniform open. — CG

Steve Martin & the Steep Canyon Rangers with Edie Brickell at the Winspear Opera House
In roughly a month, banjo-wielding funnyman Steve Martin and Dallas native Edie Brickell will debut their new musical, Bright Star, in San Diego. The production will run from September 13 to November 2 at the Old Globe Theater. This weekend, though, the Grammy-winning duo will perform in the city Brickell once called home. — CG

Asleep at the Wheel (Two Shows) at Kessler Theater
In the span of its 40-year-long career, the Ray Benson-led Asleep at the Wheel has recorded 20-plus studio albums, charted more than 20 singles and earned nine Grammys. The band also currently remains the main driving force keeping alive the style of Texas swing originated by Bob Wills in the '30s. On this night, the band will perform two shows in a theater perfectly befitting the band's storied history. — CG

Alejandro Escovedo at The Aardvark
Critical darling, cult favorite and Austin legend Alejandro Escovedo arrives in town this weekend. That news should excite Dallas resident and former president George W. Bush, who was known to rock Escovedo's song “Castanets” at the White House. Unfortunately, upon learning that tidbit, the left-leaning Escovedo stopped performing the song live for a spell. Now that Bush has long been out of office, the song's since made its return to Escovedo's set lists, and he'll likely pull it out at this one — well, unless Bush decides to show up. — CG

Bernie at The Inwood
Everybody's talking about Richard Linklater's Boyhood these days, but in the 12 years it took to film that masterpiece, the director shot a whole bunch of other really high quality works as well. For instance, there's 2012's dark comedy, Bernie, the outlandish-but-true story of a beloved Carthage, Texas, mortician who, much to the delight of the town's people, murders 80-year-old millionaire Marjorie Nugent (read: the least-liked woman in town). In an even stranger turn, since the film's release, Linklater's even helped the film's protagonist, Bernie Tiede, secure his release from prison. He's also let let Tiede live at his house. Sometimes, the truth really is stranger than fiction. — CG

Bukakke Moms (Album Release) at Oliver Francis Gallery
THRWD magazine presents this release party for Bukakke Moms' newest album, The Chronic. Performing at the party — other than the delightfully-named Bukakke Moms, that is — is Drug Mountain, Load-in and Thor Johnson. — Ashley Gongora


16Bars.xxx House Party at 406 S. Haskell Avenue
Once again, the 16Bars.xxx folks are throwing a party in an East Dallas house featuring a whole bunch of local hip-hop acts. Tonight's performers include scene vet Dustin Cavazos as well as up-and-comers Marlee, K. Vation, G.U.N. and Devy $tonez. Entry is free with the donation of a school supply. Do it for the kids. — CG

Saturday

Ray LaMontagne at the Music Hall at Fair Park
Many people will be quick to tell you that the low-key music of laid-back folk-rocker Ray LaMontagne is tailor-made for throwing on in the background while you're doing other stuff. LaMontagne is not one of those people, however. At one of the earlier shows on this tour, LaMontagne got pissed at some folks talking in the audience, threw a huge hissy fit, yelled some F-bombs at them, stormed off the stage and refused to continue the show until they left. So, it's probably best just to keep your mouths shut. — CG


Coffee and Cars at BMW of Plano
It began as just a gathering of no more than 10 cars on the West Coast. But, now, Cars & Coffee has gone international. And, yes, that means there's a Dallas gathering of the event, as automotive enthusiasts meet up to share their passion for cars with others while enjoying a cup of coffee on the first Saturday morning of every month. Better yet, it's one of the top automotive gatherings around, showcasing everything from classics and exotics to concepts and hot rods. Located at Classic BMW in Plano, Cars & Coffee is open to the public and free to attend. Not a bad at all. But consider going early before it gets too hot out and and so you can find a decent parking space. Remember: For obvious reasons, everyone tends to drive to these things. — Hance Taplin

Dirty South Festival at Trees
The lineup for this year's Dirty South Fest includes Oh, Sleeper, He is Legend, Maylene & The Sons of Disaster, War of Ages, A Bullet for Pretty Boy, Wilson, Mouth of the South, The Ongoing Concept, Emily Grey and A Tragedy at Hand. So purchase your ticket already, you little metal head you. — AG

Joe Torry at Arlington Improv
Though Torry may consider himself a baller, he shouldn't be confused with longtime New York Yankees manager Joe Torre. Rather this guy is a stand-up comedian — and a Cardinals fan, for that matter. — CG

OMG Music Fest at House of Blues
OMG Music Fest takes off for its 30-city summer tour featuring a few of YouTube and Vine's most popular musicians, including Jacob Whitesides, Round2Crew, Alyssa Shouse, Grant Landis, Dylan Holland, Reed Deming and Tyler Matel. Yes, there are folks “making” it in the music business thanks to their Vine accounts these days. How bummed will folks be when they show up to this one only to find out these people's songs really are just six seconds of audio that repeats ad nauseam? — AG

Soulja Boy at The Prophet Bar
First of all: No, Soulja Boy's not dead. Far from it. Actually, he's living quite well, thanks. Because here's the thing: Against all odds, Soulja Boy is still around, still producing hits and still stunting on anyone with the gall to blast him as a potential one-hit wonder in the wake of his breakthrough “Crank That (Soulja Boy)” smash from the fall of 2007. Since the release of that Internet-spurred hit, the man who arguably deserves the most credit (or blame) for the once-red-hot “D-Town Boogie” movement and the rapper born DeAndre Way has extended his career through the likes of such hits as “Turn My Swag On” and “Pretty Boy Swag” before deftly reinventing himself in the wake of his third LP, 2010's The DeAndre Way, as a street-savvy mixtape artist. Which is why we're stoked to help bring him to town for this show. — Pete Freedman

The Dangits (Album Release) at Lola's
Fort Worth punks The Dangits are throwing a party for the release of its new album. Bring your grandma. She'll enjoy the band's name, but no promises on their sound. — CW

Da Mafia 6ix at Dada
Since reuniting back in 2013 without Juicy J, Three 6 Mafia opted to alter its name a bit to reflect its new lineup. Da Mafia 6ix released its debut, 6ix Commandments, back in March, and it debuted at No. 34 on Billboard's “R&B/Hip-Hop Albums” chart. So this should be a good one. Even better? The Outfit, TX, Tunk and World Life open this one. — AG

The Ghost Wolves at City Tavern
Austin's The Ghost Wolves released its album Man, Woman, Beast in May and, since then, the band's been touring pretty much nonstop. Also, they're a husband-and-wife duo and that's just adorable. — AG

Claptone at It'll Do
The Disco Donnie promotions team is throwing another banger bash. This time, it's with Claptone and DJ Red Eye. Clapton's from Germany, so be sure to congratulate him on his nation's recent World Cup win if you get the chance. — CW

The Black Dotz, George Quartz and Wiving at Double Wide
Wiving isn't The Undoing of David Wright. But the lessons learned from that earlier foray have indeed helped Denton's Liz Larsen shape her new outfit — to a point. Even for a synth-building, electronic wizard like her, Wiving's massive performance rig is still something that Larsen describes as technological feat of sorts. It allows the bass-playing Liz to simultaneously double and otherwise manipulate wife Heather's vocals on the fly as she plays her own instrument, thus affording their group the opportunity to assemble a wide array of sonic landscapes underneath their other efforts, too. Here, the duo — one of DFW's most interesting acts — will open the show, which easily stands as one of the most solid top-to-bottom bills going this weekend. — CG

“Miyazaki at The Modern: Masterpieces of Animation” at The Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth
Acclaimed and legendary filmmaker Hayao Miyazaki made his final film last year. To celebrate a long and prominent career, the Lone Star Film Society’s ArthouseFW Society has teamed up with the Modern to showcase all mediums of his work. This is not to be missed, film nerds. — CW

Chainsmokers at Lizard Lounge
Looking to dance? Chainsmokers has your back. At this party, they will be spinning until 4 a.m. Elle Morgan opens. Doors are at 9 p.m. Cigarettes are expensive. Don't bum them out when Chainsmokers are around. You'll get real broke, real quick. — CW

“PRINTS!PRINTS!PRINTS!” (Opening Reception) at Cohn Drennan Contemporary
The Cohn Drennan Contemporary is celebrating printmakers from a group of University of Texas at Arlington students. All prints are for purchase, so bring your thick wallet. — CW

Mona Kasra: “#solidarity” (Opening Reception) at CentralTrak
We live in a time when selfies and social media are all the rage. Here, CentralTrak gives these two phenomenons a deeper look. —CW

Art Monsters Art Show at Fashion Art Network
Celebrate a night of fashion, art and music at this one. Dallas rapper Dustin Cavazos will surely be the highlight of the evening, but there are so many artists involved, you're bound to find a new favorite. — CW

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Fun Run at B&B Theatres Wylie
To promote the release for the upcoming Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, B&B Wylie 12 is hosting a 5K run. Participants will get to meet the turtles and will be taking home a ticket to see the 1990 classic Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film on the B&B Grand Screen, plus a free T-shirt, a turtle headband and a pizza, courtesy of Mr. Jim's Pizza. Bonus: If you stick around, you can be a part of a music video for the band Partners in Kryme. All proceeds will benefit the Wylie Christian Care Center. Turtle power! — CW


Sunday

Lakewood Brewing Co.'s Second Anniversary at Goodfriend
Lakewood Brewing Co. is hosting its second anniversary celebration on Sunday, August 3, at Goodfriend Beer Garden and Burger House. The event will feature 18 different taps of Lakewood brews — such as its Rock Ryder American Rye Wheat and Hop Trapp Belgian-style IPA — plus live music and LBC merchandise. The taps open at 11 a.m. and commemorative glassware will be available to first-comers. — Porttia Portis

Sarah McLachlan at Winspear Opera House
For eleven years now, the ASPCA has been running those gut-wrenching ads showing abused pets and set to the soundtrack of McLachlan's “I Will Remember You.” It's gotten so bad that the opening guitar strums alone send us into a depression spiral for hours. We don't hold it against Sarah, though. The rest of her catalog is actually quite solid as mom-pop goes. Besides, even she says she changes the channel when those ads come on. — CG

Residual Kid at Gas Monkey Bar and Grill (Free)
It's pretty much impossible to upstage a band as outlandish as Japanese comic book punk outfit Peelander-Z. But, for a moment there at that band's most recent Three Links show, it seemed as if Residual Kid, the three-piece of (just barely) teenagers from Austin just might have had a chance. The band, which looked remarkably comfortable in a bar setting despite its members' young ages, opened its set by offering the audience ear plugs, then proceeded to rock out at a high volume, inspiring awe and commanding attention from a punk rock-loving audience. Before long, curiosity gave way to all-out fandom and the audience — including members of the headlining act — encircled the stage, rocking out to the band's set. It's unfortunate, in some aspects, that the show couldn't have ended right then and there. — Karlo X. Ramos

Native Lights at Crown and Harp
Native Lights will be brighten Crown and Harp tonight, Joining them is Dallas' Ethereal & The Queer Show and For Silence, the latter of which will be performing its first show. — CW

Ruby the RabbitFoot and Patriot at Wild Detectives
Have you been to Wild Detectives yet? You really should go because that place is awesome. Plus, it will be hosting a backyard show this evening with Ruby the Rabbitfoot and Patriot. So now you have an excuse! — CW

Rittz at Trees
Get nasty with Tech N9ne protege Rittz. Or with openers 24K, T-Ryde, DJ Ronnie Blaze, Raz Simone and Tuku Carter. But, mostly, with Rittz. — CW

To find out what else is going on today, this week and beyond, check out our events page.

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