Let's Pretend We Don't Exist.

Before we get around to talking up items going on in and around Dallas this evening, here's a quick public service announcement: If at any point tonight you become exposed to radiation, scientists recommend you chug a beer ASAP.

True story.

We also hear beer remedies other ills such as boredom and social awkwardness. Those theories, however, aren't necessarily backed by science — yet, that is. More testing is in order before we can conclusively say one way or another.

Guess that makes us all amateur scientists tonight, huh? — Cory Graves

of Montreal at Trees
Longtime of Montreal fans are well aware of how drastically the band's sound changes between each album and tour. It's no different with its 12th studio effort, last year's Lousy with Sylvianbriar. The disc hearkens back to the grooving '70s-era sound and features, dare we say, some country influences and nods to Leonard Cohen and Bob Dylan? Frontman Kevin Barnes explains that this move away from the band's previous dance-oriented efforts is due, in large part, to spending so much time cooped up reading Sylvia Plath's poems while writing the album. Don't fret, though: For all the allusions to the suicidal poet, there's still plenty of upbeat vibes to the band's newest batch of tunes. — Jordyn Walters

Jim Gaffigan at Verizon Theatre
Jim Gaffigan is known as the king of clean comedians because he pretty much never works blue. Hell, the only time he really even gets blue is when the grocery store's all out of Hot Pockets. — CG

Mutual Benefit at Dada
Mutual Benefit is the musical alias of Ohio-raised folk pop singer-songwriter Jordan Lee. His most recent album, the critically adored Love's Crushing Diamond, was written in St. Louis and recorded in Austin with a bunch of backing musicians from Boston. He gets around. Atlanta one-man band Suno Deko opens. — CG

HoneyHoney at Cambridge Room
Fun fact about HoneyHoney: The band's first album was released on Kiefer Sutherland's now defunct Ironworks label. He also released a Lifehouse album, though, so perhaps that's not the most promising cosign. These guys' sound is more alt-country-meets-spaghetti-western-soundtracks, though, so they should be a bit more awesome. CW

Deep Vellum Presents: Carmen Boullosa at The Wild Detectives
Carmen Boullosa has been called “Mexico's best woman writer” by Roberto Bolaño. Her newest novel, Texas: The Great Theft, centers around a little-known 1859 Mexican invasion of the United States, and represents one of the first novels published by Dallas' upstart Deep Vellum publishing company. As such, the author will drop by The Wild Detectives to read from, discuss and sign copies of the book. — CG

Guttermouth at Lola's
Hey, punk. Here's a lineup worth showing up early for: Dead Words, Fat by the Gallon, Rome I$ Burnin', In the Whale, Against the Grain and Guttermouth closing the night out with a bunch of old ska bangers from its 26-year-strong career. — CW

Warpaint, Liam Finn at South Side Music Hall
No matter where you see Warpaint, know this: You will wait. The band's soundchecks and set changes are interminable, to which audiences at Warpaint's last Dallas show can certainly attest. It's mostly understandable; the California quartet's arrangements are exacting, so it makes sense that these players expect a bunch from their equipment. But that wait weighs a ton. By the time the band starts its set, you've already over-thought the whole thing. There's this voice in your head saying, “I should like Warpaint.” And, at first, you're prone to agree with yourself. The band has an immensely talented rhythm section, just the right amount of “Who gives a fuck?” in its stage demeanor and a smoky aesthetic that lends itself well to the best of what the band is trying to do. And yet, the band is, somehow, less than the sum of its parts. The loop-happy Kiwi, Liam Finn, opens. — Stephen Young

Groundhog Day at Sundown (Free)
Last year marked the 20th anniversary of Harold Ramis' comedy classic starring Bill Murray as a weatherman faced with a waking nightmare of living the same day over and over again. You should celebrate by drinking half-priced whiskeys over and over again tonight on Sundown's rooftop patio. It's what Punxsutawney Phil would have wanted. — James Wallace

To find out what else is going on today, this week and beyond, check out our events page.

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