Have Bizarre Celebrations.

Judging from the sheer volume of things going on around Dallas this evening, there's a greater-than-zero chance you'll wind up at a bar at some point tonight. If you do find that to be the case, you should treat your bartenders well. Tip them at least a buck a drink minimum, and don't, under any circumstances, call the cops to complain about being overcharged — especially when your tab was just $30 for 10 beers.

Not only will you just make yourself look like an entitled jackass, you'll also face fines for abusing the 911 system, thus totaling exponentially more dollars than your cheap beers.

Besides, you'll want to save that cash for doing funstuffs — like the following, for instance. — Cory Graves

of Montreal at Trees
Six albums into of Montreal's career, the band made the dramatic shift from technology-shunning, '60s-aping to making some of the most interestingly chaotic, electronic-influenced pop music of the aughts. For the eight albums that followed the sea change in philosophy, frontman Kevin Barnes took to writing and recording most of the works himself, partially alienating his friends, family and bandmates in the process, and discovering alter egos in the depths of his personality. Sure, Barnes struggles to reconcile the value he places on art versus how he treats those around him; and while those deficiencies may not make Barnes the greatest role model, they are part of what makes him one of the most prolific and interesting artists of our time. — CG

Tobacco at Dada
With his synth-heavy, electronic solo project, Black Moth Super Rainbow frontman Tobacco leans heavy into the pseudo hip-hop beats that are sometimes hinted at in BMSR's own catalog. That's not to say what he does is hip-hop, though; this darker, noisier and more aggressive. Rackety as it is, there's still plenty of catchy elements to latch onto, though they're often buried pretty deep. — CG

Dr. Dog at House of Blues
For the past decade or so, Philly throwback rockers Dr. Dog have been a rather consistent lot. From 2002 to 2006, they released six LPs, three EPs and a handful of special edition 7-inches and compilation albums. And for the most part, each of these lo-fi recordings were done at the no-frills Meth Beach rehearsal space/studio that's essentially served as the band's home base for eight of the last 10 years. But when it came time to record last fall's B-Room LP, the band decided a change of scenery was in order. So when the lease on Meth Beach expired, the boys began renovating an old silver mill on the outskirts of town into a legit studio they later dubbed Mt. Slippery. And immediately following the completion of that months-long construction project is when the band began recording their most recent album. Check out our interview with the band here for more information on this show. — CG

Cashmere Cat, GoldLink at It'll Do Club
Twenty-seven-year-old Norwegian producer Cashmere Cat has risen through the ranks quite steadily the past 12 months, thanks largely to tracks he's crafted for the likes of Usher, Juicy J, DJ Mustard, Tinashe and Ludacris, not to mention frequent collaborations with Ariana Grande. He's also rumored to appear on Kanye's upcoming record, which just might make him a household name. The equally buzzing GoldLink shares this bill. — CG

Furious 7 Ultimate Release Party & Car Meet at AMC Mesquite 30
Over 1,000 souped-up cars are expected to turn up for AMC Mesquite's Furious 7 premiere party. See next year's “Best Picture” winner before all your friends, and be treated to a free car show to boot. Sounds like a win-win. — CG

Dana Carvey at Meyerson Symphony Center
Don't take the fact that Carvey has mostly faded into the background in recent years — save for a recurring voice actor gig on the Nickelodeon animated series The Fairly OddParents — as evidence that he's lost a step. Last time he was in town, for instance, Carvey offered up basically what was expected of him. He's one of the all-time great impressionists, and, as such, that was the focus of the bulk of his set. His Obama impression? Just as spot on, turns out, as his more-familiar takes on presidents George H.W. Bush, George W. Bush, Ross Perot, Bill Clinton, Ronald Reagan and Jimmy Carter, plus former vice president Dick Cheney. It was a frantic, non-linear collection, and it was loosely connected, if at all. Not surprisingly, though, the crowd ate it up, right along with his set-closing take on Sean Connery. — Hampton Mills

Citizen Kane at Texas Theatre
This past winter, the Texas Theatre's biggest supporters helped the indie moviehouse raise funds to purchase a DCP projector. Good thing, because it makes screenings of this recently restored 4K DCP version of the greatest motion picture in American history possible. — CG

Colossal at Wyly Theatre
For this epic work of theater, Kevin Moriarty will transform the Wyly Theatre into a full-on football field, complete with bone-crushing tackles and a drumline. As for the play itself, it centers around a paralyzed UT football player, struggling to walk again after an on-field injury. It's as relevant a narrative these days as there ever was. — CG

AT&T Patio Sessions at Sammons Park (Free)
Tonight kicks off another season of the Performing Arts Center's free, low-key, outdoor music series, which will run for the next several weeks. It promises to be fun for the whole family, with food trucks and such for the kids and The Roomsounds providing the dad-rock for, well, the dads. RTB2 also performs. — CG

Red Bull Worldwide Paper Plane Contest at Frontiers of Flight Museum
Think you know all there is to the art of paper airplane folding? You probably don't know a fraction of what David Rees has got rattling around in his noggin. He devoted an entire episode of his Discovery Channel show Going Deep to the matter, including a segment in which he interviews current Guinness World Record-holder John M. Collins, who designed a paper glider that flew 226 feet and 10 inches back in 2012. Anyway, it's probably a good thing to brush up on prior to entering this Red Bull-sponsored paper airplane contest. — CG

Wayne “The Train” Hancock at Vagabond
Wayne “The Train” Hancock's blend of western swing and old-time honky tonk are the closest thing you'll find to the sounds of Hank Williams Sr. these days — especially now that Hank III's begun to lean so heavily on his punk side. — CG

Native Lights at Three Links
For some 20 years now, Bryce Chambers (Ester Drang) and Johnathon Ford (Unwed Sailor) have been dabbling in drone-y post-rock. With the Oklahoma natives' current project, Native Lights, there's more than a bit of My Bloody Valentine biting and nods to the great shoegaze acts of the '90s. There's a greater-than-zero chance you might hear an OMD cover tonight, too. Frauen and For Silence open. — CG

Blade Runner and Scarface Double Feature at Granada Theater
If you've yet to see this Harrison Ford-led adaptation of Philip K. Dick's Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep yet, you've only got a short while longer before its meaning totally shifts. The '80s-made film, which depicts the futuristic dystopian society of America circa 2019, is going to seem pretty silly four years from now when things look nothing like they do in the cult classic. Of course, it'll be all the more chilling if it was right on the money all along… — CG

Celebration! White Rock at White Rock Lake
The organizers of this event don't just want you to think of it as a run, as there will be lots of local food and drinks as well as live music to enjoy, too. But if you want to run, it's $45 for the 5K and $50 for the 10K. And though it's timed, you need not worry. It lasts about an hour, which means, as long as you can walk or run a mile in a little less than 20 minutes if you do the 5K (or 10 minutes if you run the 10K), you're good. The food after the race will be free, and there will be door prizes at the event. — Carly Seitz

Thieving Birds at Billy Bob's
Combining rock, country, roots and blues, Thieving Birds has a sound all its own. And the band's from Fort Worth, which makes us love them even more. — CS

Burger and Bow-Wows Dinner at Chop House Burger
Chop House Burger will donate 10 percent of its revenues from this Thursday to Dallas Pets Alive, which is an animal rescue organization that has an especially soft spot for dogs. And, of course, you can bring your dogs with you, as the restaurant allows dogs on the patio. — CS

The Low Down: Launch Party at Red Light Lounge
Red Light Lounge and The Guild DJ's have teamed up to host a Burning Man-themed dance party every Thursday, starting with tonight's inaugural edition, and it's pretty perfect for those of you broke and frugal peeps. There's no cover, and well drinks are only $3 a piece. — CS

To find out what else is going on today, this week and beyond, check out our events page.

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