How Many More Times Will Starfest’s Masochistic Organizers Say “LOL JK” And Pretend Things Are Going According To Plan Before They Finally Give Up?

One day, the Starfest Music Festival might actually happen. But if it does — and that’s a big if — it won’t happen on the now-infamous “pop-up” event‘s originally scheduled dates of September 8 and 9, 2017.

After just about a whole month of vehemently arguing that nothing was wrong (despite mounting evidence to the contrary), that the fest was definitely happening as announced (even when it became increasingly clear that it wasn’t) and that the joke was one everyone but them (lol), organizers finally conceded in an update posted to its website this week that it would not be happening on its target dates after all.

Rather, that since-removed post noted, the fest would be pushing its offering back to a to-be-determined date in November and that it would be retaining 90 percent of it planned lineup at this rescheduled affair — which, y’know, maybe? At most, the festival only ever announced about 20 percent of the performers it claimed it would eventually boast, so that claim is pretty impossible to verify. Really: Who even knows what this festival’s final form will actually be at this point? It’s almost impossible to say, really — although no one’s told that to the Starfest team, which just keeps on yapping.

In a press release issued by the company this week, organizers claim that they’ve found yet another possible venue for their event. This one, they say, is “in the heart of Dallas” and boasts seats and a better general admission area — just like they said when they moved to Lone Star Park, which is not, it should be noted, in the heart of Dallas.

Little to no information beyond that is available at this point, except that Starfest’s site is currently promising “a GREAT announcement coming soon” and also that it’s raising money for American Red Cross’ Hurricane Harvey relief efforts.

Of course, any possible lineup, as has been the case from the get-go, still remains a mystery. Actually, it’s maybe more mysterious than ever: Pollstar this week reports that Machine Gun Kelly’s agents say he was never confirmed for the fest despite the fact that he’d been announced as confirmed by the fest at one point, much like how Flo Rida’s reps had previously also denied that their client was confirmed to the event as the fest’s site promised.

Against all odds and as time goes on, it somehow gets even more difficult to believe anything Starfest announces — like when its press release announces that the fest still aims to bring “an impressive roster list of a-list celebrity recording artist [sic], insuring [sic] a celebrated concert experience for its upcoming two-day extravaganza.”

On the other hand, we will acknowledge that one line in this week’s press release from Starfest does seem wholly accurate. That would be the part where it says the fest “continues to wow music fans,” which is undeniably true.

Remember: This is a festival that has lost at least one and maybe two venues, that has stared down a lawsuit, that has burdened all kinds of negative press and that has now admittedly blown right past its target dates. And yet Starfest keeps on going.

That’s wow-worthy, for sure.

But at the end of the day, what’s a music festival without a lineup, date or venue? Because right, now, Starfest has none of those.

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